Me Myself I

For weeks I have been so lost, confused and mad because of my lack of depression. I know it sounds arbitrary and it's unhealthy. However, it's my norm.

Finally today, it's a rainy day and I do so love the rain. I feel the dark, dirty, claws of depression grab me up and surround me with a comforting feeling of self loathing and general disinterest for my own personal mental health. 

Now here is the tricky part, I want to be nothing but overjoyed that my dark friend has returned again and with rain as added bonus, but there is no happiness in depression just depression.