Drugs VS Hugs

This very morning I was pulled over and clearly stoned. When the officer asked me if I was intoxicated I replied " I choose drugs over hugs, because hugs lead to sex and sex leads to aids and aids is for life and drugs only last a few hours." The officer looked stunned and proceeded to gave me a verbal warning to not get cought again, because most of the force would not appreciate my attempt at educated humor and I would end up in jail for acting smart, being smart and doing drugs.

Non of this is true it's just funny. 

Plovers Drive Thru....We serve obesity threw a window.

This blog will be the short story's I wright whale working at my fast food job. If you are confused about any of the characters, just ask me in the comments and I will explain who influenced them that day; and in no particular order....Enjoy.

Hi Welcome to plovers. Can i stab you in the neck today?? Well then may I turn your unborn child into a burger? I will name it the child molester, it will come with a free side of candy. No again?!? Well aren't you picky.... How about I ram a large fry up your ass with three sides of ranch? I think it will go great with how pinguid you are. Well fine then drive away, you suck anyway!


There is a dog running in a meadow full of dandelion's, then suddenly a zombie appears from no were and BAM.... The dog pulls out a double barrel 12 gauge sawed off shotgun and blows the mother fuckers head clean off.... Just as its rotting corps hits the ground a young boy who owns the dog come over the ridge... Scout?!? Scout!? he shouts. The dog just stands there with the gun then BAM Marty stops writing. ;p

She was stumbling down a dark and damp ally in the lower end of New Jersey, looking to score some tar. When above her she hears what she thinks to be a bird swooping by. Then she sees what it really is.... She starts to genuflect and pray.
Dear God,
I see who you have sent for me today, and I am not
scared.For I know that I am not a good, clean, or
forgivable person. However I am sorry.
and before she can say amen her head is rolling into a dirty puddle. The silent strikers job is done and another jukey is put to rest.

So a dude walks in a barn and asks a horse why the long face?.... I want to kill. I want to kill a well-built white man. I want to stab him multiple times in his chest. I want to look him in the eyes, and him look back into mine. I want to watch the life drain from his eyes,and have him look at me and know I have all the power an I am taking his life and I could stop when ever I want... but I don't want to .

I need to get ready for a party and I have been writing these for a while, so I will finish typing them all up later.

The short storry about Bob.

My name is bob, and I am an alcoholic. I cant remember the last time I was sober, and my last drink was what I put in my coffee. I don't want to or plan on quitting. I came here cause I would like to meet some people of the same interest as myself, you know thous things called friends. I have no family, am very wealthy, don't want kids, and have a huge (pause for effect) ego. I like being left alone when I am sober, so I am not sober often. I always have porn on my T.V for company and I don't believe in religion. I live in the upper east side in a large house with a pool and a garage full of exotic cars... I have grown tired of this so I will leave some of my cards on the table.